Yeah, I did it. Don't try to hide it at all. People is sheeple and I's da man of the hour, all eyes on me - just how I like it. If you do something for attention, sheeple understands that and won't get mad. And if any radicals do get mad, just call them 'mean' and then you're the victim. Sweet!
Trick is not to be publicly ashamed of anything you do. Da sheeples will figure you must of done nothing wrong if you're not acting ashamed! Don't you love sheeple logic?? Facts are no fun and truth makes us look bad. It's only in politics where all our fantasies can come true - so politics is where I wanna live!
So after I done that rapin' of her daughter, mean ol' Nancy said all sorts of bad things about me. She goes on TV and everything just to make me look bad! The nerve of her. She said I did a crime and it was really bad and I should have to pay and a whole bunch of other dastardly things. She was so boiling mad she was "right on the verge" of actually filing charges. Yikes!
But, hey, I know something she don't: there ain't no rules in politics! Dummies like her think there is. I hears them say shit like "Da sheeple ain't stupid" so they's always afraid sheeples won't like them. But sheeples like it when you treat them like shit! They think that means they got a future, I kids you not.
So all I had to say is my dick is a Republican and she's being all divisive and shit just like she always complaining everyone else is. All the peeps on my side loved it! "He's hurting the people we hate! Woohoo!" And I go on TV and say how I got nothing agin Nancy or even her daughter I raped and I was willing to eat dinner with them sometime. But they both come back on TV all snotty and shit after my generous offer - and then she goes straight down in da polls!
Next I hires me a lawyer who'll say anything anytime. Her name is Julie Onney. We have meetings where we laugh our asses off making up shit. Then my lawyer go on TV saying it right out loud! "Nancy Pelosi is a sexist, picking on my client only because he's a male. And she's also the worst kind of hypocrite. We all know had my client been a Democrat she wouldn't be saying a word right now - not a word! This is clearly a partisan attack and the American people won't stand for it." All the base people loved it!
Me and my peeps are watching them news channels afterwards seeing our shit be repeated over and over and over. We's laughing so hard they actually repeat our crap our sides is hurting! Then they sit around and debate and wonder if we actually mean what we say and get all indignant-like and say all the shit we say is going to blow up in our face and blah, blah, blah. Knock our made up shit all you want - just keep talking about it is all we ask! That's how I keep winning.
We was throwing popcorn at the screen every time ol' Nancy come on. She looks like she's ready to explode. I know I done wrong and she know it too but nothing she can do in her own stupid head! She sits around with her peeps making strategy calls ("If only a Democrat had raped your daughter we'd be tearing him to pieces right now!") and saying only Democrats is good people so they got to do whatever they can to hold onto power and that if they go after me for breaking some laws "he just isn't worth it" cause they think no one will like them no more. Smart thinking there, Fancy Nancy!
Damn, I love me some political! As long as you get enough sheeple to liken the shit you do, you can get away with anything. I hear them TV talking heads on her side saying how "shrewd" Nancy is and that anyone wanting to enforcing laws on me is "radical" and "short-sighted." Amen to that, brother! Shit, man, she going to be this dang dumb I oughtta go hump her daughter again! Political people just ain't normal.
[Epilogue: Just in case you thought she was gonna get any smarter, I ran right into her smart ass in person. So I looks at her and says, "Did you bring your handcuffs?" and started laughing my ass off right in her frozen face!! Guess that stuck in her craw cause later I heard her say she wanted to "see me in prison." She just ain't gonna charge me, HAHA! Thanks for the free pass, Fancy Nancy!]
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