Unemployment: Da FINAL Solution!

"Nay, indeed, if you had your eyes, you might fail of
the knowing me: it is a wise father that knows his
own child. Well, old man, I will tell you news of
your son: give me your blessing: truth will come
to light; murder cannot be hid long; a man's son
may, but at the length truth will out."
- The Merchant of Venice

Hi folks! It's me Robert the hardworking Republican! My enemas say I exploits the poor and shit like that but that's what da poors there for, ya moron! You see da sticker on me Hummer: "Republicans: We work hard so you don't have to". So I asks ya: is dere ANYTHING wurs than sum bum that don't do no work atall? They's got sum nerve breathin' up the sames air I does! But it look likes thay coming to there census!

In one of the darkest tallies of the nation's still-sputtering recession, experts say financial desperation has played a significant role in increased calls to suicide-prevention hot lines -- and likely has led to increased suicide rates.

While government statistics on suicides often lag by two or three years, experts say the easier-to-track calls to hot lines have grown significantly. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline, which operates 24-hour crisis help lines around the country, reported an increase of 18 percent from January to May this year. The rates have fluctuated wildly, from 13,424 in January 2007 to a peak of 59,500 two months ago.



Yessiree! Off yaselves ya lazy basterds! Good riddens! It's about the only ways you can make the world a better place! You gots another think cummin' if you thinks you can take away me goodies you sikk commie basterds! Leave my shit alone, goddamit! Thar's a reeson I needs all da guns I got! You peeples wants to take away everthin' I own! Dam you all to hell!

Now look you no-workin', criminal-lovin', space-wastin' useless subhumans, thar's a reeson ya gotta work to live: it's the ONLY way EVER to make life any good atall! You doan wanna werk that fine by me! Jess don't come back whinin' and bitchin' what you got no food or houses or crap like that! I don't wanna heer it! You done maid your bed, go lie in it! Iffen we don't force peeps to werkin' then nothin' ever would get done!

• An armed man facing foreclosure in Chattanooga, Tenn., who called police early July 1 threatening suicide. Authorities said that after officers arrived, the man talked with them from the porch of his house and then burst down the steps waving his gun while screaming, "Suicide by cop!" He died in a hail of bullets.

• A husband in Santa Ana, Calif., who called police later that same day to say he had shot his wife while she slept and then overdosed on Valium in a murder-suicide pact the morning they were to be evicted from their apartment. He survived and has been charged with murder.

• A husband and father in Anaheim, Calif., facing foreclosure and a mountain of credit card debt, last month shot and killed his wife, critically wounded their 3-year-old son, shot at but missed their 5-year-old son and then killed himself, police said.



I's a Bible man, a lover of the Lord and a holy perverter of the Word. We's all made in imagery of God and we all knows Gawd is a no-good-son-of-a-bitch cuz thats the way peeps is! It's just dam logical. So we just gots to keep a gun to ya head to keep ya doin' what yous supposed ta! Simple dat. You wants a nightmare hell no one can survive? Jess lets peeps do whatever they wants! Cant no trust atall the ways the Good Lord maid ya, no sirreeee!!!

And since we's doin' the Lord's werk that makes our systemical a sumpthin' no Gawd-feerin' man wood question no matter wot! So if the systemical sez ya can't have no werk thar's a good reason for that: we doan need you no more! By-bye! Sumtimes we's just gotta stop billding cars and houses and eelectronical stuff cuz we just stop needin' dem all the sudden. Simple dat! We gots to make ya werk and we gots to make ya not work if we wants to save the world. Dam I luvs Amerikkka!

For some, it's a function of self-perception, and a traditional sense of the man as a family's primary breadwinner. Financial crises are perceived as personal failure, and individual tragedy expands when families are involved.

"When men feel that they are financially responsible for the family, the family cannot or should not live without them, so they take them with them," said Coontz, co-author of a report earlier this year titled "The Long-Range Impact of the Recession on Families." "You'll see cases where people will lie about having job, or having money, then when the woman is about to find out he kills her and commits suicide rather than face the humiliation. It's an over-identification with the male protector/breadwinner role."



Dem peeps without jobs is like monkees at da zoo: dont feed them! Thar ain't no excuse in hole wide werld fer not havin' yaself a job and da money god. You knows yous got no cause to bitch 'bout nuttin'! Jess be quiet and die likes a man, we's tryin' to have a party hear and no one wants to here yer squallin' starvin' brat. Dat's why we inventeds monee: so we can sees who done deserves to live and who dont not at all!

So we's aint changin nuttin! Nuttin' needs changin' cuz we's already livin' best ways possibull sense beginnin' of thyme! I red me where's this good ol' boy talked 'bout how he livin' like a dog now on account he got no monee god no more. Good on ya, boy! You needs to leeve the good stuff to rest of us wot got da monee! Dis is jess the way things gots to be no matter wot if we wants ta live the good life. Even if it eat up the hole planet doin' it, dere aint no changin' nuttin lessen yous some kinda nut!

In fact, the underpinnings of the recession, which includes the continuing collapse of the manufacturing sector and the wage structures that helped build the nation's middle class, have added a sense of class failure.

"Some of these jobs are gone forever," Coontz said. "We've already been experiencing a transition away from a manufacturing economy and this hollowing-out of secure middle-wage jobs. That is something that is very foreign to the American, the notion that they're not going to do as well as their parents, and their kids are not going to do as well as them."

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