For Your Lies Only

"I Ain't Like You Fuckers"

So this Debby Downer comes along the other day saying that one day I'm going to die. Oh, really, honey pie? Let me ask you something, do I look dead to you? Not going to happen to me, sister, and don't you forget it! She goes on claim it happens to everyone, no exceptions. "Well, then, I'll be the first, little girl!"

I gotta say that really chapped her ass and I loved it! That face of hers got all red and swollen with rage like nobody's business. She said she had truth on her side. Well, good for you, Kellogg Corn Flake! That's really special! We'll have to give you a medal or something. What a moron. Truth is for losers. And that's exact reason why I think I'm going to live forever and she thinks she's dying every day. How do ya like them apples??

I know what it is. She got that envy thing going. Sorry. Can't help you. I ain't like you fuckers. You so damn fired up to believe I'm going to die, then prove it! She just starts mumbling how everybody just somehow magically knows this and all these other fairy tales. Hey, honey, you want proof from me I'm right? It's right here! Ain't no android standing here talking to you, just me in the good ol' living human flesh.

And she thinks I make up stuff. What about that Jesus dude she always talking about? Didn't he come back to life to never die again? So technically, that makes me the second. Me and Jesus will be hanging out at the bar watching all you nonbelievers drop off one by one as we shake our heads. Positivity is what we're about and the rest of you losers don't know what you're missing. You can lead an ass to water...

The Bankruptcy

Susan was livid with the news of her firing. "I told you over a year ago this would happen."

The CEO, sitting in benign contempt at his reserved table in the executive dining room, sliced off another piece of his steak.

"So you did." He took delicious delight in the morsel.

"So just why then are you letting me go and keeping Wilson who said nothing?"

"Wilson's one of us."

"You mean he's male like you?"

"Not in the least. But you have to be like us if you want to stick with us."

"I'm not getting what you're saying. You don't mean you're glad you didn't see this bankruptcy coming?"

"That's precisely what I mean."

"What!?? I would think the firm would want to do everything in its power to avoid that!" Susan crossed her arms across her heaving chest as the outrage within could barely be contained.

"You'll never get to the top in this world with that attitude. We're not running a home for wayward boys. We're a finance firm. We play with numbers and money magically appears and disappears with no real basis in fact. That's what we do - and that's what we're going to keep on doing come hell or high water."

"And just how do you plan to keep doing that while bankrupt??" inquired an aghast Susan.

"Bankruptcy is nothing. We'll scrub our debts clean and be back in business in no time. You still don't get it, do you?"

Susan snorted in disbelief. "I guess not," she replied with dripping sarcasm.

"The game is rigged. We - those who run this industry - fixed it in our favor. We've got everyone in our pocket down to the hard-working janitor who hopes to get ahead in our rigged system, thinking he's being "responsible" and "honest" to believe in it. Quite hilarious really. And here you come along lecturing us. You had your say. You were right. Take your victory lap! Then take your very generous severance package, tell all the world how rigged the game is - and see how nothing changes, ever."

The fruits of coddling evil

Fuck You Bill Maher, And The Nazi You Rode In On

So my man Bill has been lecturing lately on how we can gotta love supporters of President Judas. To which I can only say: Go fuck yourself, Bill! I can despise anyone and anything I want at any time. When your country is being run by Nazis, then united we fall! Fuck these motherfuckers who want to burn everything down. I say we should burn THEM down. And I'll tell you something else: That's what they think too!

They are begging for someone to tell them the truth. They WANT someone to unleash them from their lies. They know they're lying to us and to themselves. And what do you want to do? Spare poor baby's feelings? Coddle criminal behavior? Hell to the no on that! We need to slap these people upside the head, tell them to quit whining and moaning all the time on what victims they are. They're not victims, they're losers - just like their loser leader.

Love takes no prisoners. Fool yourself at your own peril. Those who claim hope for despair and despair in hope are doomed without recourse. The remedy they seek to apply to others is what needs to be applied to them. By their own words they choose this - and no is pointing a gun at their head to do so. Life is hard and no one gets a free ride. But telling people it's OK to drink poison because you don't want to "offend" is unforgivable. Contrary to popular belief, no one was ever put on this planet to be "elected", only to be free.

"Somebody's probably lost a dog." Classic Bond!