I saw today where the Pope is apologizing, err, explaining his remarks once again concerning the Muslim religion. In a carefully choreographed scene by his papal handlers, his Holiness met with Muslim "ambassadors". The Pope raised his hand and gamely blurted out his best "High five!" The Muslim entourage exchanged confused glances among themselves, then an also confused Pope finished his script with: "I'm down with you, homie." Relations are reported to have soured.
Now, I was thinking, we just gots to get these folks talkin' ag'in. With my head leaning back against a tree on a beautiful, beautiful day, the wheels inside my furrowed brow were just spinning away and...nothing. And then...and then the good Lord Hisself spoke to me! (considering all the other assholes He's allegedly been talking to, why not me) Hallelujah! It's so clear an atheist could see it: Month Python's 127th Annual Twit of the Year Contest.
My first thought on bringing these two sides together was simple: an Islamic Pope. Best of both worlds, neh? But with the message from On High, I realized tain't nobody gonna be happy wit dat! This needs to be a winner take all situation. And that can mean only one thing: cage match! Here's the rules: every religion, pick your Pope and bring it on, baby! After that, all ya gotta do is win!
We all know the Bible stories: don't matter how big or strong you are, if God wants your ass to win, you'll win! And whichever religion wins has their creed declared Religion of the Year. Lord help us if the Amish are victorious. But can you just imagine the enormity of the event?? World Cup, eat your heart out! Vegas, line up your holy handicappers! Peace be on earth, we have finally decided who is most holy!
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