The Boy Who Cried Wolf (Modern Version)

The Good Farmer sat at the dinner table with his family, all but his oldest son present. He was determined to bless himself and his ways to escape his relentless inner critic.

"We have a good leader now. Everything will be fine. No more need for worry! No need to leave the table! Rest at last."

Suddenly, the oldest son came bursting in, shattering the self-proclaimed blessing.

"Wolf! Wolf! Hurry quick or we'll lose everything!"

The Good Farmer did not appreciate this sudden invalidation of his life.

"You lie, boy! We all know the story about the boy who cries wolf. You're just saying this to make me look bad. Don't bother us with your fantastic delusions!"

"But there really is a wolf! Come see for yourself! Why can't you trust me?"

"Why should I trust you when I already have everything figured out? You are not welcome in this house until you change your partisan story. Go now and sin no more!"

Thusly banished, Wolf Boy was very angry. "That sanctimonious shit! He won't face the facts until it's too late. He's more concerned about being right than being in the right."

As Wolf Boy walked into town the Good Farmer spread the story of his son's betrayal and for no one to trust him. "Otherwise I'd be a fool!" His friends assured him they had his back, vowing to support every fantastic delusion the farmer spewed forth.

On the outskirts of town was a casino where the boy stopped to rest. Inside, he was shocked, shocked by what he found.

"That's the town banker. He's gambling with our money and we'll all end up broke!"

Fearing further rejection of his appeals, Wolf Boy decided to directly confront this wolf. "Stop! This is insane! You'll ruin everything with your gambling. People will want to kill you!"

The banking predator laughed. "I am their god! I have free reign to ruin their lives as I see fit. Yeehaw! This is fun!"

"But what happens when all the money is gone?"

"How should I know? I'm no fortune teller."

"I'll tell you what happens. People starving, families thrown out into the street, desperate suicides and unspeakable suffering!"

"Don't be so gloomy doomy! Life is what you make it. And I'm making mine fine. You should do the same!"

Wolf Boy was frantic. He ran back outside forgetting all his fear. "Listen everyone! The banker's inside gambling away all our money. We must stop him before it's too late!"

"You mean he's gambling with other people's money??"

"Yes!"

"And if he loses others have to pay??"

"Yes! Yes!"

"But if he wins he gets to keep the profits??"

"Yes! Outrageous, isn't it?"

"Yeehaw! That sounds like fun! What a deal! Let's get in on the fun before all the money's gone!"

"But wait, that will only make things worse..."

Not sure where to turn to next, Wolf Boy kept heading into the city, crossing the dam as he went. There he saw a boy with his finger plugging a leaking hole.

"Hey, is there something wrong with the dam?"

"Yes, it has a leak. But I'm here to save the day!"

"Did you tell anyone about the leak?"

"Oh, no. Only a bad child would upset grownups like that. I'm a good child!"

"But you have to tell someone about this!"

"What good would that do? I'm actually doing something, not just sitting around complaining."

"But there's a reason why that crack formed. Can't you see the foundation needs fixing?"

"I can't fix all that! That's for others to figure out."

"Exactly! That's why you need to tell someone."

"Shut up, you! I know I'm doing the right thing. I'm not listening to anything more you have to say! Neener, neener!"

Lost in a world of abused children seeking acceptance, Wolf Boy knew he must seek out the Great Leader to save the day. "He's always talking about what a grownup he is!'"

In the city, fear and anger ruled with an iron grip. Headlines asked with disingenuous ignorance: "WHY SO MUCH FEAR AND ANGER?" Wolf Boy shook his head. "Even the paper is in on it. Is this a conspiracy with no end??"

Masked police gangs roamed the streets, rounding up six-year-olds for speaking terroristic truths. Wolf Boy protested to the children's parents. "You're just going to let them take your kids away like that?"

"It makes us feel safe. We're willing to do our share for national security. Who are we to question anything? We don't want to make the government upset."

"But this doesn't make us any safer! You people are out of your minds! Is everyone just an abused child walking around?"

"You sound like one of those extremists demanding unicorns and rainbows. Don't let the perfect be the enemy of the good!"

"And you people wonder why there's so much anger and fear?? Unbelievable!"

"Unbelievable is what YOU are. Don't project yourself onto us. No wonder you're the black sheep of the family."

The Great Leader was Wolf Boy's last hope. "Great Leader, please help. Tell me you know the truth!"

The Great Leader was a man of the people, seeking to calm his constituent. "Why, of course, son. I know all the truth."

"So you know the wolf came and destroyed our farm?"

"Wolves are destroying every farm."

"And you know the banker is throwing away everyone's money?"

"Oh, yes indeed. He lost it a long time ago and is even playing on credit now."

"And you know the dam has to be rebuilt?"

"My engineers have all the figures."

"And you even know they arrest innocent people on the streets?"

"Of course. Our prisons are full of them."

"Thank goodness you know the truth! We are saved. Please tell me what you're doing!"

"I must seek out the truth! How else can I know what to deny?"

"Deny? What do you mean?"

"Why I can't think of anything more upsetting than for these good people to know the true state of our condition. Can you imagine the panic? No, I will not be horribly irresponsible like that! My job is to give reassurance so life can go on as it is."

"But that's exactly what will destroy us!"

"Only facts can destroy us and all facts are currently under dispute. I seek to bring both sides together! I shall rebuild half the dam. I'm the magic Christian compromiser, people trust me. As long as my poll numbers stay up we're saved!"

"Poll numbers will only save you!"

"Same diff. Now, do you want to continue this conversation or shall I declare you an illegal whistleblower??"

"The truth is always legal, shithead!"

"Watch your language, boy. What you say doesn't count, just how you say it. Better a polite liar than vulgar truth-teller if you want to get elected."

"What's polite about lying? This whole fucking world is insane, you death-tripping motherfuckers! Try giving a shit instead of perpetually whining about what the facts have got to say and maybe - just maybe - things will work out, you dumb fuck."

"I don't care what you say! You want reality? Reality is everyone is actually fighting for love. That's how we politicians get by: knowing you better than you know you. And more people love me than love you so that means I'm right. Neener, neener!"

"Laugh now, moron. History will hate your guts - yours and every hopeless idiot who supports you. Love cannot survive in the absence of truth. You should think more of yourself. I know I do."