A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away...
Sith Lords, long thought dead and vanquished, stage a devastating attack on the Alderon system, the crown jewel of the republic. Outrage enflamed the galaxy from one end to the other as the cry for war drowned out all other voices.
The Age of Peace and Prosperity was over, proven illusory. A New Order was demanded - by faces shrouded in secrecy. The fabric of the galaxy unraveled exactly as the Sith Lords had designed. This change - a warping in the path of the universe - came in the twinkling of an eye.
Luke Streetwalker, abandoned and outcast for his warnings against the Sith Lords during the Age of Prosperity, seeks to piece together a rebel alliance to restore a time of love. But though his message on the Sith Lords is now heeded, Luke fights an uphill battle to stop the spread of war fever which will ravage the Alderon system even further...
"Luke, you pussy! We have to have war! Don't be so naive!"
The chastising came from a right-wing droid. (All droids were right-wing by virtue of their programming coming from eGeeks, a malcontent, anti-social and masturbatory lot bent on running the universe from their mother's basement). Luke rummaged through the remains of his home, furious at the insanity of it - yet determined to stop it. The droid prattled on. "You just going to stand there and take it? Time for war! Yeehaw!"
Annoyed, Luke switched off the Beck droid knowing it's pointless to argue with a mindless entity. But words of war surrounded him wherever he went. Even the local cantina played war songs and sold "freedom food" in honor of the new sentiment. Though having been right on the Sith Lords - that being out of sight meant only the greed ran deeper - his message for fighting them was lost all over again. Reason had died with the attack.
Luke cried as he saw precious farmland poured over in concrete as munitions plants replaced nature's plants. Just as he feared, food production fell but with the storehouses still full from the Age of Prosperity no one concerned themselves such troubling trivialities. Luke knew he would need help and he found it in his reprogrammed droid R2Cat2 bringing him a message from Princess SlayYa, telling him of another voice speaking out against the war: barack-wan kenobi.
An alliance was formed. Princess SlayYa, renowned across the galaxy as the finest fencer with a light sabre ("You can't hope to win - only for a draw."), teamed with Luke in search of barack-wan and his audacious powers of hope. Time did not stand still, however, as the sky darkened with fighters launching off to battle cheered by droids and eGeeks and the rest of the simple-minded. In the Imperial Senate, the President declared the end of democracy - and that too was cheered.
The war had begun; the war declared done; the war never won.
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The Drone Wars and a Horrible Truth Is Revealed
As the republic became an empire bound by war and famine...
War begat war. And even after victory declared, more and more troops were demanded until even the mercenary forces of Blackwater Fett were called in. Still, war lust ran high in the Alderon system, no one questioning the ever increasing powers of the Emperor-President or conduct of the attacks. The rebel alliance reached its darkest hour.
But with the flow of body bags returning and reports of hundreds of thousands of deaths infecting the Alderon soul, an ill feeling arose in far off segments of the galactic front. But though support was fading at the edges, a searing core of hatred propelled the wars forward against all dissent.
The Imperial Senate lost all power, cowering before the Emperor-President. Had the Alderon system gone too far? Were its motives as pure as claimed? Quietly, the rebel alliance investigated the truth as reality strayed further and further from the Official Explanations. As the anti-war movement gained a foothold, the rebels discover a secret too terrible to be believed...
Contact had been made with barack-wan kenobi, his campaign to enter the Imperial Senate a successful one. But with all power stripped from the governing body, he was forced to use the power of his Jedi mind, swaying millions with his words. "Hope," he said, "is not lost." Talks brewed of his possible takeover of the Presidency.
"This is Princess SlayYa," introduced Luke, "be stupid at your own peril." Using her unparalleled skill, her lightening sabre cut through all idiotic arguments, exposing the illogic of war for war's sake. But it was like fighting a hydra, another false argument popping up with each one slayed. "Victory" could only be seen in the shrillness of each new contention for the wars, hysterical and out of touch. In a fatal error, the people of the Alderon system soon disengaged from the debate, hoping both sides were wrong.
Luke, meanwhile, penetrated the highest echelons of the empire in an attempt to find the truth for the escalations. Good news was not expected when he found he could slide his way in by using a cloak of evil. With anxious ears Luke listened to words of infamy hissed from the newly declared Emperor.
"Everything is going as planned, Darth Cheney!" The Vice-President a Sith Lord! Can't be! "Our profit per soldier is skyrocketing. The more we get killed the more the manipulated masses insist we stay! It's like a dream come true! Money! Death! Power! And how can they speak against us without speaking against themselves? We are the greatest liars in history! The Force is with us!"
Darth Cheney bowed before his master who had escaped all blame in the intentionally botched battles. Such was his master's powers, no criticism could touch him, responsibility deflected to "bad advisors" for this "well-meaning" man. Perversion gripped the solar system as incompetence was sympathized, greed normalized, and wishful thinking worshipped as the truth. The dark lord Cheney brought more good news.
"There's a resolution before the Senate to raise you from Emperor to Daddy. Once done, our rule will be permanent - barring the sheep actually grow up."
Luke's worst fears had been confirmed. Those immature bastards! They've taken over everything! It's true after all: our Daddy is a Sith Lord!
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Episode III: Return Of The Big Lie
Pain has come to the empire. Starvation is spreading even as wars carry on unabated. A cry for change rings out...
With suffering came a call for change. barack-wan kenobi's star rose as an anxious empire sought salvation from the unbearable Sith overlords. Princess SlayYa rallied support for a new hope with her impeccable logic finally grinding away at the consciousness of the Alderon people. At long last the winds of war were changing direction.
Tears of joy flowed and fireworks exploded with barack-wan's toppling of the reviled Sith lords. Order and respect were deemed restored in the empire. Years of blatant corruption rotted the infrastructure, money-lenders had hoodwinked millions with governmental complicity, and a war-weary populace ached for relief. Overflowing crowds applauded the new Daddy (barack-wan retained the Sith Lord's powers).
But Luke Streeetwalker never saw a change in the hearts of his Alderon cohabitants, observing rather a mere reaction to their newfound anguish. Was true change on the horizon - or simply a mirage? Was this as times before, when the Sith Lords appeared overthrown but in reality still ruled from the shadows? Luke had to find the answers to these questions before his soul could rest with the Force.
With the promise of change, the anti-war movement died down even with a waxing of the wars. The economy of the Alderon system had collapsed under the weight of greed unleashed by the Sith Lords. And yet even more was taken from the needy and given to profiteers - with nary a whisper of serious dissent. The power seized by the Sith Lords was not only not returned, but increased. But the new Official Story was things had changed for the better, no need to worry. From the Dark Side of the Force a knowing laughter could be heard.
Yes, the Sith Lords had won once again by going underground. barack-wan kenobi used his mind tricks for what he said he believed was good. "These are not the banks you're looking for. Move right along," he soothed to a group of infuriated Sand Traders whose land had been swindled. Useless Idiots screamed in fanaticism to support barack-wan or the evil Sith Lords would return to power and all would be lost. The policies did not stop but the protests did. The Grand Deception sealed with a kiss.
The last of the Jedi of the Light, Luke walked a lonely road. He frowned as children were pushed away by their parents. "Stop your whining, brats! Everything is fine! Now shut up or no one will love you!" Later, he saw those same parents pushed away by the Imperial Senate - only this time the parents were told to shut up or be unloved. They complied lest their own words be used against them, the Grand Deception upheld. From tangled webs as these did still the Sith Lords pull the strings. Nothing had changed and the Word was neither spoken nor heard.
So what will they do when they do when they find their money and their military won't save them?
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