Monday, January 05, 2009

Show Me What You're Made Of, Madoff

I saw this funny headline on MSN: What punishment could fit Madoff? Here's a little taste of the article:

Media accounts immediately labeled the disappearance of $50 billion, masterminded by Bernard Madoff, as the largest fraud in history.

It is a greater wealth loss than having one of many household-name companies -- such as Walt Disney (DIS), 3M (MMM) or Boeing (BA) -- vanish without a trace.

The loss is mind-boggling. But the figure does nothing to convey the damage this alleged Ponzi scheme has done.

Dear Lord, let me be judge for a day. This guy is easy. "I can always use another good dishwasher." This soul needs a life sentence, working full time at one of those fine restaurants he frequented, shining the plates of his former mates. Some may say that it's humiliating for an elderly man to wash dishes until he dies, but I say those people must have an issue with hard work. I mean, our man Madoff, in the finest Enron tradition, certainly had no qualms on foisting this fate upon his fellow aged colleagues. What's good for the goose...

While we're at it, let's put our president monkey in karma's court. Love seeks out every heart in its pursuit of justice, neh? This fine fellow can spend his remaining days in a kick-ass Iraqi refugee settlement complete with his own tent and communal latrine. We know this is a man who'll make any sacrifice for freedom - and freedom is messy.

Speaking of karma, it sure is hard to pity the peasants who finance their own fucking. "Gosh, really, Daddy? You need all my money to save God's country? I'll work two, three jobs and give you all I got! You'll be so proud of using me!" Yes, useful idiots still exist and they'll bring ruin to the watered land as well as the dry. And then we'll walk into the desert together and wonder why it happened.

And now for something completely indifferent:

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