Church Pees On Jobless, Tells Them It's Raining

"Dear God, please let me keep my money -
oh yeah, and them other fuckers' too."
At first I thought it was a Monty Python skit:

Church Of England Publishes Prayers For Those Being Made Redundant

But no, 'tis real life satire. Read it and weep:

The Church of England has issued two prayers for those facing up to redundancy.

The new Prayer On Being Made Redundant and Prayer For Those Remaining In The Workplace are aimed at bringing a few crumbs of comfort to those out of work - and to those left behind who have lost their work colleagues.

The Prayer On Being Made Redundant helps to put into words the anxieties of those who are losing or who have already lost their job.

It includes the verse: "Hear me as I cry out in confusion, help me to think clearly, and calm my soul."

The Prayer For Those Remaining In The Workplace focuses on the guilt and increased workload associated with redundancy and asks of God: "In the midst of this uncertainty, help me to keep going: to work to the best of my ability, taking each day at a time."

Or to put it more simply, "Thank you, sir. May I please have another?"

I always loved Martin Luther King's line, "We must learn to live together as brothers or perish together as fools." Somehow I doubt throwing someone in a ditch and promising to pray for them qualifies as "living as brothers". What's truly interesting, though, is how we see all this needless human suffering and yet the guilty blood of it stains the hands of no one. Oh, there's some talk of "evil corporations" but we call their evil necessary so that we can make the same claim for our own. Maybe that's why they call this the "Human comedy".


What you never hear is questioning why it has to happen in the first place. We assume ourselves innocent by claiming our throwing of people out into the street to be a force of nature and we merely the helpless bystanders. But I wonder if God - the only opinion that counts - sees no blood on our Lady Macbeth hands for turning children out of their homes? I wonder if God buys into our socio-economic theories and artificial principles of monetary manipulation? If not, then we're screwing all these people over for nothing.

"Look, kid, no there ain't no food shortage. It's just that no one's can afford to feed ya. You gotta understand! Blimey!"
Suffer your children unto me - for none are born a capitalist. I think what Dr. King was saying was that living as brothers is not optional, it's the only thing to try. I agree with that. For no matter how much we wail and moan and pontificate and vociferate and lie to ourselves that this is the only way, in the end it means nothing. Calling the earth flat makes it no less round. But we do proffer that holding up said belief as unquestionable gives proper excuse not to explore the truth.

What did the first man say the second man halfway down after jumping off a skyscraper?
"So far so good!"
Thusly, we see no connection between ourselves and the sheriff's car pulling up to the neighbor's house with an eviction notice - no more than we see a connection to the soldiers who nailed Jesus to the cross. Just people doing their job - and who will question that? Apparently, very few. For such scared sots are we, we consider it acceptable even when the crime is perpetrated on us. But c'est la vie, no? Even though paradise lies just beyond the horizon - if only the world weren't flat, we could reach it.

"Hey, you there up on the cross, tough break! Got nothing to do with me! I'll pray for you after I go kiss some Roman ass. C'est la vie!"