A Spaceman's Final Thought

The infinity of space
Has a nature all its own;
Answering to a grace
Man has rarely shown.

Boundless dark consumes me,
Drifting from my dreams;
But when your claims are empty
No one hears your screams.

No matters of my heart
Or thoughts left in my mind;
Remedy the part
Of my severed tethering line.

I cut it with my lies,
I float out on my back;
Where do I turn my eyes
While drowning in the black?

"Do it! Do it! Do it!
"You don't want to be alone!"
So urged the souls who blew it -
With the losers I now moan.

But when your life has gone to shit
And there's nothing to be done;
It's matters not a single whit
If you're not the only one!
The madness of the moment
Gave me solace for a time;
Forgetting what my life meant,
With love the future's mine.

Twinkling starlights mocking
With life I'll never know;
My anger did the talking -
A short-lived, hallowed show.

From windows on the ship
Peer broken-hearted faces;
Watching my unwanted trip
Away from my loved places.

With tragedies repeated
The stubborn man does bleed;
At the banquet I'd be seated
With the faith of a mustard seed.

With ears both blessed and haunted
You hear this dead man's final thought:
Doing what I wanted
Was doing what I ought.