Am I supposed to be interested in living without Emily in my life?
Years ago, I pretended to say goodbye, as if I could face life without her. Call it a political post.
To be apart from a forever friend and partner is to be forever amiss.
"Even if I got married, I'd still need Emily." I remember telling a confidant.
She's never far from my thoughts. I thought she was a god.
I couldn't find anything I had to offer a god.
I stare at the empty bottle in broken desire of a feigned life.
Turns out needing someone is to make a claim on their life.
With Emily I'd be impervious to a mad world. I can only smile.
So now my shouts have withered to whispers.
Solitaire, the one game where you lose when you win.
