What Are My Rights?

Do I have the right to live in a world I can trust?

Do I have the right to walk down the street naked unharmed?

Do I have the right to dream if it makes no money?

Did Jesus have the right not to be crucified?

Did we have the right to invade Iraq?

Did we have the right to FUBAR this planet?*

Does anyone have the right to run another's life?

Does one have the right to self-abuse?

Does a man have the right to live without a woman?
(answer known)

Do I have the right to pervert my art to my own ends?
("May I borrow five pound and two?
"I must pay my debts to Mama Lou.
"If this thing you can do,
"I'll write a lovely poem for you?")

Do I have the right to be free of the supervisor who fears my intelligence?

Do I have the right to avoid good films if they show relationships I can't have?

And most importantly: Do I have the right to eat the goddam Fruity Pebbles bought especially for me because everyone knows those are my favorite but Insomniac Bastard gets up early and devours them all when his favorite is Frosted Flakes and there's plenty of those but noooooooo he has to eat my shit?**


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The answer, my friend
Is NOT blowing in the wind.
So ask yourself.
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From American Gigolo,
a vastly under-rated psychological film:

Detective Sunday
Doesn't it ever bother you, Julian?

Julian Kaye
What?

Detective Sunday
What you do.

Julian Kaye
Giving pleasure to women?
I'm supposed to feel guilty?

Detective Sunday
But it's not legal.

Julian Kaye
Legal is not always right.
Men make laws.
Sometimes they're wrong.
They're stupid...or jealous.

Detective Sunday
And you know better?

Julian Kaye
Some people are above the law.

Detective Sunday
How do these people know who they are?

Julian Kaye
They know.
They ask themselves.


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Footsie notes:

(*This is a question that separates children from adults. Well-fed children will write you lovely, self-serious essays on how great our future will be. We adults know better than to subscribe to such cynicism.

** Yeah, yeah - this is what was really bugging me...)